I just finished reading Pride and Prejudice aloud with my wife. I learned in Teddy Roosevelt’s biography, that he loved to read aloud to his wife. The read aloud aspect had such a wonderful crackling fire, library feel to it that we decided to give it a try. I chose Pride and Prejudice because it is my wife’s favorite movie and thus, my best chance of getting her hooked on reading together. It was a fabulous book, but I’d like to give a few pointers to any husbands who might be trying to read this book with their wives 1; it provides some challenges for those of us suffering from various forms of stereotypical maleness. Husbands, if you follow my game plan you will be able to pull this off and even enjoy yourself. This does not have to be the reading equivalent of a Sandra Bullock movie.
Tip #1: Cleanse your reading palate.
Last week I tried to eat an orange after brushing my teeth. I found the orange so bitter and disgusting that I couldn’t finish it. And so we see my enjoyment of the orange was entirely dependent upon the last thing that entered my mouth. Reading Pride and Prejudice is not much different; you need to watch what you consume directly beforehand.
Here are a few things to avoid:
Hunger Games was the most gripping book I have read since The Deathly Hallows or The Half Blood Prince. Pride and Prejudice is not gripping. It meanders like a Sunday stroll. If you still have Hunger Games on your palate, you will be making the bitter orange face the entire time and asking your wife things like, “Is there any sort of death match soon?” or “I bet with a little training, Elizabeth could be handy with a pair of throwing knives.” It’s just not fair to Pride and Prejudice, your wife, or even peaceful, innocent Elizabeth.
Hemmingway was once asked if he spent much time editing The Old Man and the Sea and he replied by saying something like, “Read that book and see if you can make any sentence even one word shorter.” Jane Austen is anti-gripping and she is also the anti-Hemmingway. It would not surprise me if asked the same question she might have replied, “Just try and make one of my sentences even one word longer...”
The beginning of The Old Man and the Sea starts like this: “He was an old man who fished alone in a skiff in the Gulf Stream and he had gone 84 days now without taking a fish.” In Jane Austenese that sentence turns into something like this, “In the sun drenched humidity of the vehement Gulf Stream there once lived a man whose countenance had suffered failure after failure to procure various forms of salt water vertebrates from which he derived his livelihood, passion, love and existential fortitude. Nay, it was nearly 6 fortnights past whence he last had a companion upon his solitary maritime vessel which, in the not too distant past, had kept him sailing through many suns, moons, hurricanes, and sunsets.”
In short, she’ll feel a little wordy and grandiose on the heels of Hemingway, like she’s a wonderful speaker in love with the sound of her own voice. Just know, like Hemmingway and the rest of us, she’s a product of her time and geographical location. She’s brilliant, but a brilliance hewn from the Dickinson (who was paid by the word!) style of longwinded, old-school British verbiage.
And so I recommend cleansing your reading palate with something a little slower paced and grandiose. I’m thinking some sort of narrative non-fiction that takes you back to a slower simpler way of life. Of the books I’ve read this year I’d recommend David McCullough’s, Mornings on Horseback. Appropriate time period, perfect pace, and tactfully wordy.
Tip #2: Stay humble.
I’m warning you, there will be a lot of talk about relationships, manners, and dancing at balls. You will feel like the lone Y chromosome at a bridal shower in 17th century England. Now, if you are a prideful male convinced there is no wisdom to be had from a bridal shower, you will perhaps miss Pride and Prejudice’s greatest quality: the jewels of wisdom Ms. Austen throws in among what appears to be silly chatter. If you aren’t humble, you will cruise right by them trying to get to the action.
Some of my favorite jewels are as follows:
“…their passions were stronger than their virtue.”
(Yikes, this concisely describes high school and college…)
Speaking on their shared disdain for small talk Elizabeth says: “We are each of us an unsocial, taciturn disposition, unwilling to speak, unless we expect to say something that will amaze the whole room, and be handed down to posterity with all the éclat of a proverb.”
(Hmm…my distaste for small talk doesn’t seem so…personality driven)
“Nothing is more deceitful than the appearance of humility. It is often only carelessness of opinion, and sometimes an indirect boast.
(ouch! I do love to appear humble…it’s not a stretch to see humility masked as boasting)
The book is drenched in wisdom but we will miss it if we are not humble. And while we’re talking humility, don’t be too proud to read with a dictionary in reach. She uses big words. Humble yourself, grab a dictionary, and learn a few. Don’t pretend like you know what she’s saying all the time.
Tip #3 Read in a British accent.
I’m not sure which axiom of speech pathology I have stumbled upon, but when I read Austen in a British accent, it flows off the tongue and I can better intuit the intonations of her language. Remember, its jam packed of old-school British verbiage and even if the accent is just in your head, you will somehow read faster and smoother than trying to hammer through in your own unsophisticated accent.
Tip #4 Be prepared for a shock.
The story itself is not shocking. If you haven’t heard already, Darcy and Elizabeth get married as well as Jane and Bingley; it’s all a matrimonial paradise. But what’s shocking is how tender you will feel towards Elizabeth and how much respect and admiration you will have for Darcy. I really can’t explain how Austen did it either. For the first half of the book I was convinced I didn’t really care, but as Darcy’s layers are slowly (very slowly) peeled back, I found myself rooting for this relationship as much as I have for any literary romance.2
Also surprising is Austen’s ability to write the villain. When Lady De Bourgh demanded Elizabeth to stay away from her nephew and threatened to destroy her family with all her money and social influence, I desperately wanted Elizabeth to showcase her hidden knife throwing skills. My read aloud voices became intense and loud, I’m thinking “Aha! Death match! Let’s do this!” In this case, De Bourgh’s villainy was magnified by the fact that for 3/4 of the book I was quite convinced the only villain was dull conversation and a silly 16 year girl.
With a few easy considerations and a proper frame of mine, this story can be enjoyed by all. Simply stay away from thrillers and Hemmingway beforehand, hang in there when it slows down, open your heart to the characters, and above all, read in a British accent—no, sorry—above all, be prepared for Austen’s wit, wisdom, and loveable characters. So grab your sweetie and shut off that TV. Sit up in bed, and by the light of your nightstand lamp put your arm around her while she rests her head on your chest. Enjoy the beauty of reading a classic aloud together.
Thanks for reading and enjoy!
1. Not that reading with your wife is the only acceptable Pride and Prejudice endeavor…
2. It’s no Ron and Hermione, but it’s up there.
No comments:
Post a Comment